TALES OF HALLOWEEN

Tales of Halloween Movie Review

 It's Halloween Night in the 'burbs, and there's madness around every corner. Adrienne Barbeau seemingly reprises her DJ role from The Fog, and she's with us for this ride, introducing many of the stories we are about to see. Ten segments make up this 2015 horror anthology, so let's get right into it. 

Sweet Tooth

Our first story shows a couple teens picking on a kid, letting him know that if he doesn't leave some of his candy for local legend Sweet Tooth, the creature will seek revenge. 

"Make it a full-sized Snickers"

We get a ton of gore to start us off, and a fairly interesting story to boot. The acting is shaky (that's being nice), and the flashback scene is more irritating than anything. Still, this was a solid start to the film, and it left me wondering how Sweet Tooth would do as a standalone feature film. 

The Night Billy Raised Hell

Mr. Abbadon (Barry Bostwick from The Rocky Horror Picture Show) catches young Billy in the act of egging his house. He brings Billy into the house, and takes another youngster in the same outfit for a night of terror around the neighborhood. 

Looking for their next victims

This one is heavy on the comedy, but unfortunately, isn't really funny. It's not particularly scary either, but sort of redeems itself with a little twist ending. The one thing that stands out about this entry is the lighting--it's fantastic.

Trick

Four adults are terrorized when a group of kids invade their home. This outing starts off slowly, as we are briefly introduced to the adults--this is just long enough to find them uninteresting, and slightly annoying, but that is strangely the point (it makes sense, trust me). Why are the kids doing this?

The why is just out of the shot here

If The Night Billy Raised Hell took the foot off the gas for this movie, Trick pressed it back down. The segment is vicious, gory, and has a fantastic twist at the end. 

The Weak and the Wicked

A boy dressed in a home-made superhero outfit and sporting a stopwatch stops three bullies from torturing a young boy, telling them he is there to "spill the blood of the wicked". When confronted by the bullies, our hero gets scared and runs away. Is he running out of fear, or for another reason?

Tick tock

Once the bullies catch up with the fleeing fella, we get a flashback scene, and learn who these four people are--to say they have a history, and that the Viking-helmeted hero has a very good reason for seeking revenge, is an understatement. The ending of this story is bloody and terrific. This was probably my favorite segment in this movie. 

Grim Grinning Ghost

An older lady (Lin Shaye of the Insidious franchise) tells the story of Mary Bailey, a girl who was made fun of her entire life for having a deformed face. The story goes she comes back from the dead to laugh at the living behind their backs. The lady's daughter gets creeped out, and when she has to walk home after her car breaks down, she thinks she is hearing laughter, sending her into a near-panic. 

As if this walk wasn't scary enough

This segment will leave you feeling a little on edge, as the tension is built quickly. The payoff is one you will see coming, and will miss if you blink it, but is one that is satisfying. The real question is how long will it be before Disney finds out about the title of the segment and puts together a lawsuit?

Ding Dong

A woman is distraught about not having children, making Halloween a night of misery for her. She turns into a demonic looking witch, and unleashes the fury on her poor husband, clawing his face. A year later, on Halloween Night, they are dressed as Hansel and the witch from Hansel and Gretel, and excited to be handing out candy. Side note: as I watched this, I was trying to figure out who the actress is. It turns out she's Pollyanna McIntosh, known as Jadis to fans of The Walking Dead.

What did you do with Rick?!!

The approach of this segment is almost exclusively that of comedy, so don't look for any scares here. This story is not really funny, but certainly very quirky, and entertaining enough that you will keep watching. 

This Means War

A traditional Halloween fan is dismayed when new, loud neighbors (including James Duval) decorate their yard with gory effects and loud, heavy metal music. The man gets furious over the loud music, and the battle is on!

John the Mod goes metal!

I don't know why the guy was so upset--while certainly no fan of most metal, I would happily take that over the "music" my neighbors feel the need to share with the rest of the neighborhood. This is another segment that forgoes any bit of horror for a straight comedic approach, but there's really not much to it. The eventual fight is uninspired, and the finale is not unexpected. There is a dude in the crowd who looks like The Blue Meanie though, so there's that.

Friday the 31st

This one starts off with a woman running from a deformed guy (or a regular looking guy in a cheap mask...whichever) carrying a severed head. She ends up in his shed, where she finds he has a collection of heads. She escapes, only to be killed when he tosses a spear about thirty yards and directly through her. This obvious nod to slasher films then takes an unexpected turn when a U.F.O. flies over, and out of it appears a small alien looking to do some trick or treating.

Seriously

What starts off as a horror approach takes a quick turn to comedy when the little green guy shows up, and stays there until the end. It actually produced a moment, soon after the alien crawled into the woman's mouth, that made me laugh loudly, but it went south quickly from there. The segment ends with a showdown that reminded me of Freddy vs Jason, or a Monty Python bit. This segment started strong, but unfortunately, fell apart. 

The Ransom of Rusty Rex

Two crooks decide to kidnap the child of a millionaire. Once they have him and remove his Halloween mask, however, they realize they have picked up more than they bargained for. For some reason, when I saw the reveal, the first thing I thought of was the cover boy of 1980's tabloid magazines, but he was actually played by the late Ben Woolf from American Horror Story.

Rusty...not Bat Boy

Speaking of the 1980's, director John Landis has a cameo in this one, playing the aforementioned millionaire. This one is also much more comedy than horror, but lacks any laughs and is just kind of there.  

Bad Seed

A jack-o-lantern comes to life and bites its maker's head off. Now the police are searching the town for it.

I think she found it

Another legendary director, Joe Dante, pops up in this one. More than anything, this segment ties the rest together. The killer in this one, of course, looks ridiculous, but the pumpkin display it hides in looks cool, and the final shot is impressive. Unfortunately, this wasn't a great story to end the movie with. 

Honestly, Tales of Halloween was a fun watch. While not on the scale of the great horror anthologies such as Trick 'r Treat or Creepshow, it is certainly better than most similar movies, especially the ones that have come out the past 30 years. It would have benefitted from more horror and less comedy--that said, nothing here is so bad it's unwatchable, and the better segments are quite enjoyable. One thing I really loved about this movie is it truly captures a Halloween feel. We have seen countless movies that are set during Halloween but don't deliver that feeling of it--this movie nails it in this department. Also be on the lookout for references to other horror films, as this is full of them. It may never become a go-to every Halloween for me, but I can say my first viewing of Tales of Halloween won't be my last.

On A Scale Of One To Ten: 7

Tales of Halloween Movie Trailer