EMELIE

Emelie Movie Review

A new babysitter named Emelie terrorizes three children while their parents are out celebrating their anniversary...actually, terrorize is a little strong. It's actually more...she annoys them. She makes them watch a porn tape. She watches with them as the pet snake eats the pet rodent. She tells a bedtime story about a mom losing her kid and looking for another one (it may or may not be an autobiographical tale).

"No spoilers Josh"

This movie promises suspense and thrills, but fails to deliver either. The story switches from the home to the parents enjoying their celebration, and as nothing is happening at all with the parents, it becomes clear these scenes are nothing but filler. The acting is bad--Sarah Bolger (The Lazarus Effect) is a bore as the title character, and the kids, as kids tend to be, are irritating--the eldest son is such a brat I kept hoping Emelie would kill him, the daughter is just sort of there, and the youngest son speaks in a way that I had no idea what he was even saying--I finally asked my girlfriend midway through the film if she understood anything the kid was saying, and she replied "Not a word". Speaking of my girlfriend, she actually fell asleep during the climax of this film--that's how uninteresting it was. Emilie is a compactly uninspired film that brings nothing of note to the table. Skip this one.

On A Scale Of One To Ten: 3

Emelie Movie Trailer