Choose or Die Movie Review
Kayla (Iola Evans), a college student from the projects, comes across a video game from the 1980s. The game promises a large prize for anybody who defeats it, but the game itself is a deadly one. Needing money for school and to help her mother, Kayla decides to give it a go. This movie, released on Netflix today, April 15, 2022, is the latest in a whole series of movies and shows based on the idea of a video game, app, or game show putting contestants in a game of life or death--when this fad dies, and in the years to come people look back onto it, Choose or Die will likely not be one recalled with great fondness...or recalled at all.
"That's just mean...but probably true"
The first thing you will likely notice about this movie is the writing--specifically, how poorly it's written. It makes you wonder if the writers were given bonuses for every dropped F-bomb. I once wrote an entire rant about this, but I will shorten it here--profanity is effective when used sparingly, but lazy and off-putting when used in excess. I'd like to say this issue aside, the movie has a lot going for it, but far be it for me to lie to my loyal readers. The acting is awful--Evans is dreadful as the lead, Asa Butterfield is only slightly better as her friend-zoned pal Isaac, and Eddie Marsan (The World's End) isn't believable as Hal, the first person we see play the game and who makes a predictable reappearance at the end--the rest of the acting in the movie, believe it or not, is even worse. The film plods along with little at all advancing the story. With credits, this clocks in at about 84 minutes, but feels twice as long. The idea of the game is as simple as the movie title would imply--the player is given a question with two options and has to choose one of them...or they die.
Tough call
The movie is not all bad. There are a few scenes where, instead of seeing the actors, we see the action play out in the style of a 1980s video game. There are some cool props, especially for those of us who actually remember the 1980s. The highly underappreciated song "Are Friends Electric" by Tubeway Army is featured, as well as music from Run D.M.C....of course, for every good song, there are ones so unbearable I had my girlfriend mute the television. Arguably best of all, horror legend Robert Englund appears as himself, but in the theme of some good, some bad this movie carries, Englund appears in voice form only (though he knocks it out of the park in doing do). Not even Englund's master vocal work makes this movie worth watching though--in fact, just watch the trailer instead, as it pretty much shows the entire film.
On A Scale Of One To Ten: 4
Choose or Die Movie Trailer
Tubeway Army's "Are Friends Electric"... thank me later
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