THE SHED

The Shed Movie Review

A hunter named Bane (Frank Whaley, Vacancy) is attacked and turned into a vampire. He takes refuge from the sun in a shed on a farm. Teenager Stan (Jay Jay Warren) lives on said farm, and after he discovers the creature, he's not quite sure what to do with it--his best friend, and fellow bullied fella Dommer (Cody Kostro), on the other hand, has an idea. 

"Remember when Henry wanted to get rid of Billie?"

The premise seems cool, though the comparison to the Creepshow segment "The Crate" is glaring. I have always been a fan of Whaley, who I believe to be one of the more underrated actors of his time, but he is terribly underused in this movie--though, until they showed him in vampire form in the shed, I did picture him killing his victims in there with a 1964 Gibson SG. Speaking of acting, most of it in this film is atrocious--making this worse is the lack of any character being even somewhat likable. The dialogue adds to the misery, as it's mind-numbing and lazy. You may think "Ooh, I heard this is set in the 1980's, so that part will be cool!", and you will be disappointed. There are no cell phones, and we see some cassette tapes, but other than that, there's no real 80's feel here--that said, one of the many movie mistakes is seeing cars that came out decades after the 1980's ended. Looking for such mistakes was truly the highlight of this film, and it's enough to keep you going. The vampires look somewhat cool, so a bit of credit has to be given for this as well. This movie just sort of plods along--you don't care what happens to the characters, but curiosity over the vampire in the shed is there. Also there, most unfortunately, is the worst cover of "House of the Rising Sun" I have ever heard. There's nothing original or interesting going on in The Shed, and honestly, there's no reason to spend time with it. 

On A Scale Of One To Ten: 4

The Shed Movie Trailer