We Summon the Darkness Movie Review
Back in the 1980's, there was this irrational fear that swept the United States--the story was that teenagers were listening to heavy metal music, worshiping Satan, and committing ritualistic murders. Any of these three actions alone is bad enough but combine them, and we have some real trouble! What We Summon the Darkness does is takes this real-life (largely) urban legend, replaces the Beavis and Butt-Head type metalheads with three chicks, and adds a Christian-lead agenda to the whole mess. While this may sound fun on paper, the delivery leaves a lot to be desired. The profanity-laced dialogue is most disappointing--filled with mind-numbing conversations and failed attempts at humor, nothing any of the characters say will make you care about them in the least. Speaking of the characters--they look like they could be Fairuza Balk's daughter...
...Colin Farrell's son...
...Abigail Breslin's sister...
...and Johnny Knoxville's father...
Wait...that IS Johnny Knoxville!
Speaking of Johnny Knoxville, he turns in the best performance in this movie--this sentence speaks volumes to the level of acting from the rest of the cast. As the film starts, none of the six primary characters are convincing, and they get even worse when the blood starts to spill and the over-acting begins. There is a fair bit of gore, but unfortunately, the CGI in some scenes is so bad you will laugh out loud--pay particular attention when the cop gets shot and when one character's hair catches on fire. If you're looking for some good 1980's metal...let's be honest; not a lot of that exists in the real world, and there is none in this movie. Making matters worse is the level of stupidity the characters exhibit--how hard would it have been to move the towels out of the way?! Unintentional hilarity, if nothing else, will keep you going through this movie, with my favorite being the character flying through the window after tripping over another character's arm--it's not quite on the level of the ending of The Galaxy Invader, but it's not far off. I also have to give kudos for the use of the T'Pau song "Heart and Soul", a somewhat forgotten gem from the 1980's, in the closing credits. We Summon the Darkness is a movie you will make it through, but not one you will likely enjoy while doing so.
On A Scale Of One To Ten: 4
We Summon the Darkness Movie Trailer
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