THE REDWOOD MASSACRE

The Redwood Massacre Movie Review

A group of really large trees in California are stalked and destroyed by chainsaw-wielding rednecks. It's now up to two environmentalist chicks to save the day and prevent...a redwood massacre!

"Wait...I didn't get this script"

A group of friends hike through the woods to get to a house for a party. What's so special about this house? Though details have faded into urban myth, what the youths know for sure is it was the site of grisly murders some years ago. So hiking and camping until you're exhausted so you can get to a place in the middle of the woods where people were killed? Sounds like a good idea to me! Needless to say, the killer still roams the grounds, and the youngsters are killed off one by one. I'm sure if you are reading this and have not seen the movie you are thinking it sounds like a knockoff of Friday the 13th--watching The Redwood Massacre will confirm this suspicion. Don't expect a killer who looks as iconic as Jason, however--our guy is much more generic.

The mask is kind of cool though

For the most part, the characters are interchangeable and have no story, with the exception being one guy is there with his current girlfriend, and his ex-girlfriend, who I would have considered killing before the masked maniac even appeared, is also on the trip. One of these characters also stands out for her wonderfully awful eyebrows.

The Peoples' Eyebrow!

What the movie lacks in character development it makes up for with the sheer number of victims. The story itself is as thin as the characters, so don't come here expecting anything too deep. For some, the thought of watching a Scottish movie will scare them more than the killer will--fear not friends. The accents here are not TOO Scottish, and you will be able to understand them (even you Sani). There is a ton of blood, but absolutely no consistency with it. For example, a girl is punched repeatedly by the overalls-wearing weirdo, sending buckets of blood flying, presumably from a broken nose, busted lip, and/or knocked-out teeth, but when we see the victim fighting back, there is no blood flowing anywhere. Some credit does have to be given to the makers of this movie--as you watch the credits, you see the same few names pop up multiple times, telling us practically every bit of the production and post-production was done by about the same four people--we've seen this scenario before with MUCH worse results. Still, there is nothing really special or spectacular about The Redwood Massacre--it's a pretty standard, mediocre slasher flick. 

On A Scale Of One To Ten: 5

The Redwood Massacre Movie Trailer