Monday, March 7, 2016


Killjoy Movie Review

Michael (Kareem J Grimes, or Jamal Grimes--he goes by both) is a nice young man with a crush on a girl, but when said girl's boyfriend Lorenzo (William L. Johnson), a gang leader of some sort, finds out, he and his "gang (two other guys) beat Michael up. Tired of all this, Michael summons a...demon? Spirit? Something that appears in the form of Killjoy the ice cream truck driving clown who, for whatever reason, appears a full year after the "gang" accidently kills Michael. Killjoy does his killing by pulling the victims into his world...or something...that is entered via the back of the ice cream truck. Before I tear this movie to pieces let me start off by introducing you to the star of our show--ladies and gentlemen, I present to you...KILLJOY!!!

I hear a cricket chirping somewhere...

This might just be the worst clown in horror movie history. He's not scary. He's not creepy. He's not funny. He's not clever. He's not funny in any way, shape or form. The dialogue can best be described as mind numbing. Imagine that irritating white kid next door in the suburbs who walks around acting like he's a gangsta by using words he may have heard in a rap song or overheard the one black person he has ever actually been around say...and make a 70 minute movie of that kid and his friends doing their best to act legit and you have Killjoy, except the actors actually are black, which brings up an interesting question (that sadly the film never addresses)--it's long been a joke that horror movies always have the "token black guy" who has zero chance of surviving, and is often the first to go, sooo....if you have a horror film with an almost exclusively black cast, who dies first? Had they gone more comedic from the get-go (they awkwardly drop pinches of unfunny comedy here and there), they could have hit a home run with this concept...oh, and the answer (I would say spoiler alert but lets be honest, nobody really cares) of who dies first is the one white person in the film--more potential comedy gold that is never fulfilled. What else is bad about this film you ask? The directing--good grief, the last time I saw this much zoom in, pull out, zoom in was...actually, I have no idea. Some bad 70s Kung Fu film I would guess. The camera is so shaky at times you would swear this is a found footage film. The angles are...look at the clown photo above, but come out to the point where you see his ankles, and, yeah, that happens a lot. The CGI is beyond bad--in one scene a characters is shot multiple times but the screen looks like a first person shooter where you see red splatter where the bullets are supposed to be entering but then the spot goes away--after taking dozens of shots there's not a spot on his shirt. The acting is so horrible it is actually enjoyable, especially Lee Marks as Jamal. I know this was the first project for many of these people, and they all seems like truly likable people (which made their unlikable characters unbelievable), so you have to give them an A for effort and spirit, and somehow getting Full Moon involved, but by the time you make it to the ending (if you make it that far--and don't even get me started on how convoluted and ridiculous the ending is) you may wonder if this was, in fact, the worst movie you have ever watched--unfortunately, I've seen worse.

On A Scale Of One To Ten: 3

Killjoy Movie Trailer. Fellow Faith No More fans will delight in this

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